none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize