I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
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we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
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The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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