so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
I intend to get homeless drunk
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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