Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
