the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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