okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I die, sorry about rent.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
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