Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
is that a dick in a sweater?
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
