ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
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There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
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