I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
I have surprise drugs for everyone
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
