It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
apparently the secret to your success is patron
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
In other news, I just burned my penis
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
