is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Randomize
