I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
no, he came in my armpit
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
worst night to have a conscience
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize