She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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