BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize