Texts From Last Night

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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.

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  (717): so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine. http://tfl.nu/pias
  Replies (11) Good night (4681) Bad night (760)
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  (334): View more from Alabama

  I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon

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  (334): I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon http://tfl.nu/p3qx
  Replies (44) Good night (6124) Bad night (986)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one

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  (908): considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one http://tfl.nu/66eb
  Replies (29) Good night (971) Bad night (6486)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?

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  (201): My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud? http://tfl.nu/2vhi
  Replies (27) Good night (7786) Bad night (1084)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?

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  (847): as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning? http://tfl.nu/weqo
  Replies (22) Good night (10050) Bad night (1046)
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  (845): View more from New York

  I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge

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  (845): I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge http://tfl.nu/to4j
  Replies (25) Good night (875) Bad night (6032)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.

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  (703): Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college. http://tfl.nu/9le9
  Replies (14) Good night (6797) Bad night (785)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes

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  (920): I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes http://tfl.nu/1teg
  Replies (9) Good night (4221) Bad night (738)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.

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  (541): To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever. http://tfl.nu/9nwk
  Replies (7) Good night (890) Bad night (3302)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.

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  (815): Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants. http://tfl.nu/z0pn
  Replies (4) Good night (1710) Bad night (900)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?

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  (615): Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ? http://tfl.nu/0u6g
  Replies (5) Good night (2041) Bad night (767)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition

  (1-317): View more from Indiana

  Impressive. I approve.

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  (317): Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition (1-317): Impressive. I approve. http://tfl.nu/uf2f
  Replies (4) Good night (1342) Bad night (339)
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  But theres a keg here and me gusta

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  (267): But theres a keg here and me gusta http://tfl.nu/yus2
  Replies (6) Good night (1211) Bad night (420)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left

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  (503): I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left http://tfl.nu/li77
  Replies (3) Good night (460) Bad night (327)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE

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  (713): Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE http://tfl.nu/k4x4
  Replies (9) Good night (993) Bad night (148)

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