Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
