I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
