I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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