I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
false alarm. still invincible.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Randomize
