i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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