I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize