My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize