so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
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