I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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