I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize