please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Randomize
