Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
