The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize