sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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