Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize