Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Randomize