I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
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