I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
