At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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