Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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