I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
is this the sara with the beer cane?
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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