I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Randomize