called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
