We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize