Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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