I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
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