Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.