i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Can you bring me the toilet please
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
