I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
