just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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