need another drink. this is the easiest way
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
Randomize
