I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Edward fifth and chaser hands
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
