nut hugger
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
