i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize