yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
