just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
