YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize